Earlier this month, I talked about Why We Need Positive Friendships, but, unfortunately, we all know that not every relationship we have in life will be positive. This week, I want to talk to you about those relationships that are so far from positive that they become toxic and how to recognize them.
When we have positive relationships, we get positive, personal benefits, like a boost to our mental health and self-esteem, a sense of belonging, happiness, and a support group to help us cope with traumas. Toxic relationships have an impact as well, leading to decreased self-esteem, higher stress levels, and a negative change in mood.
Recognizing toxic relationships can be difficult, especially when that person is particularly close to you, like a loved one or someone you’ve known and respected for a long time. Here are some signs that you might have a toxic relationship.
- The relationship is completely one-sided. All relationships are two-way streets, so there should always be a give and take. You may find that you are exhausted from being the only one putting in the time and effort to keep this relationship floating
- They refuse to deal with conflict. None of us enjoy arguments or disagreements, but conflict does happen, and we can learn from it to make our relationships better. They may refuse to take responsibility or apologize, or even act spiteful to make matters worse.
- They always blame you or others. It’s rough to find out we are in the wrong, but if blaming everyone but themselves is a recurring pattern, it could be a sign of a toxic relationship.
- They constantly try to bring you down. We are all on a journey of self-care and self-love, so we know it’s not always easy. It’s even harder when the people around us are always trying to hold us back. They could be manipulative, undermining, or generally disrespectful, and they continue this behavior even after you’ve expressed your concerns about it.
I’m sorry to say that there is not one simple solution to this, and recognizing the toxicity is just the first step. The next step is setting boundaries for yourself, practicing self-love, and finding more positive relationships.
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